How Did I End Up Living in the Heart of Dumbfuckistan
W-H-A-T T-H-E F-U-C-K!
As Sam Seder said, we should have a giant New Deal-like public works program to build a fence around this red area instead of along the Mexican Border. Then we could either round up all these rightwing nuts and send them to Alaska to be with their Ice Princess and her traitorous husband or we could start a new movie franchise called "Escape from Dumbfuckistan."
You know how bad this is? Mississippi isn't even in Dumbfuckistan!
posted by polar donkey at 12:38 PM
4 Comments:
So maybe we can be proud, for the first time, that Memphis is really the capitol of Mississippi?
7:35 AM
You do realise your interpretation of the map is mistaken, yes? It's not a "blue/red" map like 2004's infamous "Jesusland" map, but a map of which districts voted more Democratic or more Republican than in 2004? Many of the blue areas are still McCain/Republican territory, they just voted less Republican and more Democratic this time than last. Same for some of the red ones.
6:53 PM
I think that much is obvious Michael. The map is charting which districts actually moved towards the middle. What's hard to believe is that after the past eight years there are still so many districts that did not move significantly towards the middle. I think that's what's earned them the title of "Dumbfuckistan", that they contain so many people who won't budge from the right even as the worst administration in the history of America comes to its end.
6:56 AM
Polar Donkey, It's important for us to live here, even if from time to time or on a regular basis, we're quoting the David Byrne/Talking Heads tune "Once in a Lifetime." I can't tell you how many times I look at situations here in Memphis and that song soundtrack pops into my head. ("This is not my beautiful city! HOW DID I GET HERE?") And then that makes me laugh and move on.
Here's a really bad, washed-up old story that also parallels why we need to live here. Picture a comedian onstage, pitching jokes to an audience. From the edge of the stage, someone crawls out on their hands and knees from behind the curtains, looking for something.
"What are you looking for?" asks the comedian.
"My contact lens," replies the person on all fours.
"Where did you lose it?"
"Backstage."
"Then why are you looking out here?"
"Because it's dark back there and I can't see anything."
In case the point isn't clear, sometimes we're looking in the wrong places for things. We waste time on all fours pointlessly looking for things in places they're not going to be found. Memphis is like the contact lens lost in the dark wings offstage. You have to go to where the contact lens actually is to find it.
In any case, thanks for all your wisdom. Dumbf*ckistan is a great word. Kind of reminds me of gentrif*ckation.
12:05 PM
Post a Comment
<< Home